You Should Be Writing

Okay, okay - I get the message! I am committed to make June the month I re-enter the blogosphere. I just got back from an epic vacation trip with my daughter, Kate, and I have lots to share.

But for tonight, I will just say: if you have a chance to do something once in a lifetime with someone you love, do it!  See you tomorrow!

Contest: My Favorite Christmas Gift (post #2)

The very best Christmas gift I ever received was an impossible one -  a gift that did not exist from a person who could no longer give. But it was the most precious present anyone has ever given me.

Early in our marriage my husband and I were getting ready for a garage sale. I had a sewing room in the screened-in breezeway between the house and garage, but we knew I had way too much fabric and remnants. It wasn't as bad as the TV show "Hoarders" but Mike decided to help me cut down my inventory. 

When I opened one box filled with cream colored yarn, Mike asked if I had plans to knit or crochet it. I had always hoped to, but the yarn had never made it out of the box. When he suggested we get rid of it I suddenly burst into tears. My mom had promised to make me an afghan years earlier but her Alzheimers interfered - all I had left was the box of yarn. I told Mike to just take care of getting rid of it for me - it was too painful.

After the sale I figured the yarn must have sold, but actually my sly-but-sweet husband had hidden it in the back of our car. He asked around and found a lady from our church who loved to crochet. Ginny spent months secretly making it into an afghan and then on Christmas Mike presented it to me at our family Christmas, along with a note he had written as what Mom would say to me if she was no longer lost to Alzheimers. 

I often use that blanket these days when I take a Sunday afternoon nap, and it wraps me up in the love of so many people: my mom, my husband and Ginny.  Ginny also made up a pillow cover as well as a miniature afghan just big enough for my daughter Kate's doll cradle. 

Remember - tomorrow is the last day for my "Favorite Christmas Gift Contest" - just post a comment here on my blog (not just on FB) about your favorite Christmas gift and you could win a set of three hand tatted Christmas ornaments. The contest closes tomorrow night - so get that post up!

Looking forward to your comments-

Sandy Kay Salsbury

P.S. Special thanks go out to Ginny Lee... I love you!

" My Favorite Christmas Gift" CONTEST - details below

I have not composed a Christmas wish list in years. A long time ago I asked my husband if he wanted me to write a Christmas list to give him ideas. "You can if you want to," he said with a sly smile, "but you're so easy to buy for that I have no trouble." When I asked him how he knew what I wanted, he said that he had come up with "gift groups" (like food groups) and he just tries to give me a balance of things from some or all categories. 

So here is  Mike's list of  “Seven Gift Groups For Sandy” (good ideas for any woman on your Christmas list)-

1. Something scented – think Bath and Bodyworks bodywash or lotion
2. Something shiny – a piece of jewelry like some unique looking earrings
3. Something pretty – an outfit that makes me feel drop dead gorgeous
4. Something entertaining – a chickflick DVD or CD we’ll watch together
5. Something to read – fiction from Davis Bunn or John Grisham
6. Something sweet – it used to always be chocolates, but because of medical issues it will have to be white chocolate this year
          And my all-time favorite gift every year:
7. Something affirming – he always writes me a card telling me how much he appreciates me going through life together and reflects on how God has seen us through the events of the past 12 months.

There are years when we’ve agreed to not to give each other gifts due to financial restraints and other years I've received something from every category. No matter what, though, I can always count on that card, which is the best gift of all.

No matter what other Christmas gifts you plan to give this year, consider writing a card with a few heartfelt words on it for those who are closest to you. There's something about written words of appreciation and love that warm the deepest part of our hearts.

Contest - Contest - Contest - Contest
Write me a post: What is your favorite Christmas gift? Do you receive the same thing every year or does it change?


You can post on this blog through Wednesday 12/21/2012 at 6 p.m. EST. I will choose a winner and send them a set of three hand tatted Christmas ornaments. Looking forward to your posts!

Merry Christmas -
Sandy Kay Salsbury

Seasons Grieving

Even in the most festive and joyous month of the year, there are people who don't feel much like celebrating. I just got word that one of our former pastors went to be with Jesus last night after a long illness. Earlier today I read a post on FB from a daughter who was wishing happy birthday to her dad who is in heaven. Years ago I knew a widow who spent every Christmas Day alone, in homage to her beloved husband who lost his battle with Lou Gehrig's disease on Christmas Day.

In the midst of all the hubbub leading up to Christmas, it is easy to forget that each day there are families whose lives are disrupted by a death, whether it was expected or not. Each holiday someone is experiencing a "first" - the "first Christmas" or "first Easter" or "first Fourth of July" without a loved one.

As I thought about my friend (the pastor's wife who is now a widow) I realized I need to pray even more for her now as she heads into the holiday season with such fresh grief. It is never easy to say goodbye to someone you love, but it is especially difficult at this time when there is so much focus on families being together for Christmas.

I just felt tonight that I would like to encourage us all to look around our circles of friends and acquaintances, being sensitive to those who are especially missing a loved one this year. Just a touch or a word or a note could go a long way toward easing their burden right now.

Have a blessed night.

Sandpaper People Who Rub Me The Wrong Way

• The guy who drives on the shoulder and then cuts in front of you
• The woman with 20 items in the 12 item express lane at the grocery
• The telephone customer service agent who won't listen to your problem
• The relative who comes to family dinners and never lifts a finger to help
• The neighbor who drones on and on about all the trials in her life

 Got any "sandpaper people" in your life? You know the type: the kind that rub you the wrong way the minute you see them coming. The ones with little irritating behaviors that just drive you up.the.wall. Or with big grating attitudes that bring out the "spirit of slap" (as in you just want to slap them).

I like to think I am loving and that I act charitably toward everyone, but I must admit that there are types of people who add a large dollop of instant exasperation to my life whenever I see them coming. Some of their traits include being:

• rude
• crude
• opinionated  
• crass
• vain
• unsympathetic
• impatient
• unkind
• cruel
• proud
• devious
• dishonest
• untrustworthy
• single-mindedly selfish
• hateful 
• mean-spirited 
• insensitive
• argumentative
• stubborn
• hard hearted
• grudge-holding

In my experience, I've noticed two reasons God allows sandpaper people in my life:

1. To show me my own rough edges.Someone once said that the traits I most dislike in others are often because they are traits I possess to some degree, and the other person reminds me of my own failings. I have to admit I have often found that to be true. 
2. To show me who to pray for.On many occasions I have felt my blood pressure rise as I was "stuck" standing in a checkout line with a rude opinionated complainer. I would raise my eyes to the heavens with a "Why me?" only to hear a gentle "Pray for them - no one else is and they need it." As I began to pray, I would gain compassion for them and my frustration would melt away.

Next time a sandpaper person rubs you the wrong way, try praying for them. You may well be the only person who does.

My New Favorite Thanksgiving Dish: Maple Ginger Roasted Vegetables With Pecans

We just got back from spending Thanksgiving with some very special friends. Usually Thanksgiving meals end up with a lot of guilt over poor food choices, but these friends are very aware of what types of food they prepare and eat, and everything was delicious and healthy (okay, so the desserts weren't exactly kosher...).  But this vegetable dish was my all-time favorite. Hope you enjoy it as well.

Maple Ginger Roasted Vegetables With Pecans
(serves 12)

1-1/2 cups pecans
4 medium carrots, peeled and sliced 1/4 " thick on the bias
2 large parships, peeled and sliced 1/4 " thick on the bias
1 medium head of cauliflower cut into 1" florets
1 butternut squash peeled, seeded and cut into 1" dice
1 pound brussel sprouts, halved
1/2 cup olive oil
1/4 tsp. nutmeg
salt and pepper
2 TB minced fresh ginger
1/3 cup pure maple syrup

1. Preheat the oven to 425. Spread the pecans in a pie plate and toast until fragrant - about 6 minutes. Let cool.
2. In a large bowl toss the carrots, parsnips, cauliflower, squash,and
brussel sprouts with the olive oil, nutmeg and salt and pepper.
3. Spread the vegetables on 2 large rimmed baking sheets and roast for 30 minutes, until the vegetables start to brown. Scatter the pecans and ginger over the vegetables and drizzle with the maple syrup; toss well.
4. Continue to roast the vegetables for 25 minutes longer until they are tender and golden. Scrape the vegetables into a bowl and serve hot.

Have a lovely weekend!

What Thanksgiving Does For Us

If it wasn't for Sarah, you and I might be at work today instead of relaxing around a turkey dinner with family and friends on a national holiday. Although the pilgrims and Indians were credited with celebrating the first Thanksgiving, it is through the persistence of Mrs. Sarah Josepha Hale that Thanksgiving was finally designated as a national holiday. Sarah believed in the power of giving thanks and persevered through five US presidents before Abraham Lincoln finally designated a national day of Thanksgiving. Each successive President then issued an annual Thanksgiving Day declaration until finally in 1941 an Act of Congress made Thanksgiving the law of the land.

Exactly who was Sarah and why was Thanksgiving so important to her? Born in New Hampshire in 1788, she and her siblings were educated at home. Although women were not allowed to attend college, when her brother Horatio attended Dartmouth, he insisted on sharing with Sarah everything he learned.Sarah taught school and married David Hale, a lawyer who encouraged her in her intellectual pursuits. Nine years later, David died of a stroke, leaving Sarah to raise their five children alone.

With the support of friends, she published two books of poetry, the second one containing her original poem that we now know as the nursery rhyme, "Mary Had a Little Lamb."  She also wrote a novel, "Northwood" which described a New England Thanksgiving meal, the first reference to what we now consider a traditional Thanksgiving meal, complete with turkey and pumpkin pies.

Sarah later published a book of short stories, including one called "The Thanksgiving of the Heart." In it she describing how a group of people giving thanks together changes a community.

“Our good ancestors were wise, even in their mirth.  We have a standing proof of this in the season they chose for the celebration of our annual festival, the Thanksgiving.  The funeral-faced month of November is thus made to wear a garland of joy…

There is a deep moral influence in these periodical seasons of rejoicing, in which a whole community participate.  They bring out, and together, as it were, the best sympathies of our nature.  The rich contemplate the enjoyments of the poor with complacency, and the poor regard the entertainments of the rich without envy, because all are privileged to be happy in their own way.”  

Sarah was on to something there – Thanksgiving/giving thanks with others does change something. Hearing the blessings and struggles that other people have experienced in the past year has a way of changing my perspective of my own situations. Earlier today I took a long walk with a dear friend that I haven’t seen in a year. As we talked, I realized that she and her family had gone through several situations that I hadn’t fully pieced together from the few letters or phone calls we have had. It made me all the more grateful for her friendship of reaching out to me even in the midst of her own situations, and more determined to stay better in touch in the future.

I wish you a happy Thanksgiving today – and pray that the power of giving thanks changes us all.