Pray It, Don't Say It

My mother, Elizabeth Bloch, was one of the most gracious women I have ever known. She was known for her kindness, musicianship, and willingness to help anyone. She once confided in me that she had been "a rather selfish person" in her young adult years, and she had made a lot of mistakes. As a result, she spent the rest of her life trying to serve others. She hated to rock the boat, so to speak, and spent a lot of her time praying as she went about her daily activities.


I loved my dad, Robert Bloch but there were times that he could be rather blustery. He was the son of a Danish immigrant and a long line of "I am the Papa" figures from the old country. He had very definite ideas of how things should be and would make his opinions known. I remember listening to my older sister arguing with him in her teen years and decided that kind of "debate" was not the most effective way to approach my dad. I would come up with all kinds of strategies to make what I wanted seem to be what he wanted. Sometimes I still resorted to debate, but usually I tried to find a way to get what I wanted without actually crossing him.

My mother had a better way of dealing with people, especially my dad. She practiced the philosophy of "pray it, don't say it" and it was amazing to watch. It worked like this: Dad would have a decision he needed to make, and he was leaning a particular way. Sometimes Mom would have a better idea, but rather than just blurting it out, she would pray something like this:

"Lord, I think ____ is a better choice than what Robert thinks we should do, but I leave it up to You to tell him." That way she wasn't confrontational, she trusted the Lord to lead Dad, and the results were out of her hands. If she was right, the Lord would tell Dad, and then the decision would be made. If she was wrong, only she and the Lord knew it. It only works if you don't care who gets the credit, and there's the rub.

If I honestly want what is best for the situation and the persons involved, I don't care who comes up with the right answer. If it bothers me that no one knew it was my good idea, chances are my motives were a bit dicey.

I'm not saying that I should just sit quietly and pray rather than contributing to a healthy discussion about a decision, but there are times it is better to be silent and let the Holy Spirit do the talking. Another one of Mom's sayings was "I will intrude my personal opinions only in my prayers," which meant that she wasn't going to argue about something - she was just giving her opinions to God.

As Americans, we want to control and tell others what to do, but there comes a time when it is best to quite literally leave things in the Lord's hands. He knows what is best, and I know enough to trust Him.